Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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