i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
