She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Randomize
