i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
These 19 Ladies Love Pegging Their Men
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Terrible idea I love it
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.