good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Randomize