on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
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