I'd wear matching sweaters with you
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
