Grow some girl-balls and come out already
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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