Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
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