I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
