Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
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