Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
