You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I think my vagina is haunted
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
