Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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