Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
im on a boat
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