But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Randomize
