I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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