youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
