So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
