Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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