Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Randomize