Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
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