You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
