So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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