the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
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she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
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Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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