I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
operation have a gay friend backfired
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
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