Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
only you would photoshop your dick
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
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I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
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