sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
