i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
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