I am puke
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
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