Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident