I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test