If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Randomize
