And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
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I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
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IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize