is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
