singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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