No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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