I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
