I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Randomize
