Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Randomize
