Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Pappa wants mamma naked
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
