Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
