NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
