i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
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long story
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weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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