Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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