I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
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By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
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Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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