Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
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