dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
