I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
