This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
love makes seman taste better
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize