If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
