the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
don't judge my taste in strippers
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
